How To Tell If A Woman Isn’t Interested In You (Nonverbal Signs!)

If a woman is not interested, she won’t always come right out and say it. So how are you supposed to tell that she just wants to be left alone?

Not being able to read her signals is one of the top reasons you’re still single.

Here are some of the most obvious nonverbal cues that a woman will send out when she’s not interested in you.

1. Her body is turned away from you and she’s closed off

The best way to tell that a woman isn’t feeling your encounter is to pay attention to how she is carrying herself. Is she closed off? Are her arms crossed? Is she kind of hunched over making herself small?

complimenting a girlThese are all indications that a woman is feeling uncomfortable and perhaps not really interested in you. Maybe you’ve done something to turn her off, or maybe she has a boyfriend. When we like people, or when we’re even open to talking to people, our bodies reflect this mindset by physically opening up. And conversely, if our bodies are closed off that means that we’re not feeling the conversation and/or interaction.

Think about how you carry yourself when you like someone or what your body does when you’re enjoying yourself. Body language isn’t super gendered, so think about what you would do when you’re feeling uncomfortable and not interested in an interaction. And apply that when you’re trying to decipher if a girl is interested in the conversation or not.

2. Eye contact is limited

The second thing to take note of is if a woman is maintaining eye contact. This is one of the easiest ways to tell if a woman is interested in you and the encounter because when we like someone, we want to look at them. And conversely, if we’re trying to swerve on out of the conversation, then eye contact will be limited and she will be looking everywhere but your face. That is a universal sign that she’s not interested and she doesn’t want to engage with you.

I had this happen to me last night. I was out for dinner with a girlfriend and we were at a restaurant seated at the community table. These two gentlemen sitting across from us were being particularly pushy. Granted, we were sitting at the community table so conversation with strangers is a given, but not a requirement.

These two men kept offering us shots, which we graciously declined, and then they asked us to go out and party with them after, and we, again, graciously declined because we had to work in the morning.

They were being so unbelievably pushy! Not really taking no for an answer. I stopped responding to them and stopped making eye contact, and had my body turned away from them and was directly facing my friend hoping that these men would catch my drift that we were not interested in drinking with them and or going out with them later.

They were not catching our drift. And we got up and changed tables because they would not take a beat.

Take this story as a lesson to realize that when women want to talk to you, they make an effort to by responding to you, looking at you, and facing you.

3. Her feet are pointed away from you

isolate the girlWhen our feet are pointed away from someone with whom we’re speaking, that means we’re preparing to leave the conversation.

Actually, if a woman’s feet are pointed away from you, that means that she has already, mentally, begun to leave the conversation and that her body will follow suit shortly. She’s setting herself up to get out of your interaction. She’s not interested.

This isn’t a 100% surefire rule, but it definitely does apply much of the time.

On the flip side, if she’s got her feet pointed in her direction, she could be into you.

4. She’s leaning away from you

The final, most obvious way to tell that a woman isn’t interested in you is her proximity to you and if she is leaning away from you. When we like someone, we want to be near them. And we will make any excuse that we can to get next to them.

If you notice that the girl with whom you’re speaking starts to pull away, and lean out from your conversation then she is disengaging from the interaction.

She’s, non-verbally, saying that she needs space. It’s quite simple, when women want to continue a conversation or continue to get to know someone, their bodies make it pretty obvious because they want to be next to that person.

These are what I would consider to be the top four signs to take note of if you see when you’re interacting with a woman that you’re trying to hit on. When women lean in, make and maintain eye contact, open up their bodies and face you straight on are all signals that she’s interested in your interaction, however, if she does the opposite of these gestures, then chances are she is not interested in you and you should give her some space.

So, if she refrains from making eye contact, pulls away from you, closes off her body by crossing her arms, and or is facing away from you these are all subliminal signals that a woman isn’t interested.

That’s all I have for you guys today, thanks for reading… if you’re still looking for more, read this related article on how to tell if she is into you, and be sure to check out this new blog post from Marni (aka the ‘Wing Girl’) as well.


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  • Hey Kate Im Steve and I live in Tennessee. Just wanted to say I enjoy your podcasts.. Thanks Again Steve

  • Hey Kate, you have great content here and on your channel. I have a question for you. The body language of a girl I’m interested isn’t quite consistent as this. Sometimes both her arms are crossed or just one arm crosses her body to hold the other, but just as often her body language can be wide open. Eye contact is pretty consistent when we converse and sometimes she will face me directly, sometimes I notice her feet and how she’s faced will move away but she continues to contribute to the conversation and keeps it going. I was thinking she has interests but is holding back. What do you think?

    • Hello Andre! These signs are meant to be indicators. They don’t exactly have to be consistent but seeing one should be a warning sign for you. In your case, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s not interested in you, but could spell different reasons like being uncomfortable with the the place, or the topic that you guys are talking about. If she’s still sending mixed signals that gets you all confused, watching my video about how to tell if she likes you might do the trick for you, so watch it using the link below:

  • Hey Kate, I’ve watched a number of your videos and I must say that Im impressed with your content, style, and delivery.
    Your videos are very well done, and in a format that works well for men.
    You’re a great communicator, with a confident speaking voice. You’re very easy on the eyes, and all of your looks work. I think you look better with your hair down!

    Enough about that Kate, I wanted to give you a quick shout out and yell you how much I like your work! Keep it up, you’re providing a great service! I look forward to reading your handbook!



  • Hi Kate..

    I sometime chatting at night with a girl, her respond relative good, sometimes quick replied, and sometime slow replied in the morning. But I just know that she does not save my WA number.
    Is that a sign that she is not interested on me ?
    I ever met once her and talked for 10 minutes, she showed a good sign like maintaining eye contacts and her body face to me.
    Is that she plays hard to get, or really not interested ?

  • Hello Kate, I meet a girl some moth ago, she keep eyes contact for a long time, and some time i notice she was looking a me she also make an eye wink must of the time, but know she turn the table and act like she hate me, I wan something have somthing with her and I din’t know how to get her want me again

    • There must be a reason why she’s acting that way Pedro. Did you do anything while she was showing interest? Or you didn’t take any action and just kept waiting for her to make the move? Because if that’s what you did, there’s no wonder why she acts like that. All the same, it’s time for you to talk to her and find out what’s wrong, fix the problem, and start to take it to the next level.

  • Hey Kate, I like watching your videos since it’s useful information! I need some advice though at the moment.

    So I met this beautiful girl through a friend and we exchanged numbers through social media since we were physically attracted to each other and note that she recently got out of a serious relationship. I texted her for a bit but the conversations through text weren’t very interesting. Then I asked her out for dinner because I was in the city for a little bit and wanted to meet up with her, so she accepted the offer. The dinner went great in my perspective since we got to know each other much better and talked a lot. She told me whenever I come back to let her know so we can hang out again, we haven’t spoken since. So I don’t know if I should keep talking to her or give her some space since she just wants to “have fun.”

    • So far, so good Chris. You’re actually doing great! You should use this momentum and keep talking with her but of course, avoid appearing needy and desperate. Just keep it cool and take your time. Remember that this isn’t a race so just enjoy while you’re at it! Here’s some tips that can help you avoid some traps that men usually fall into at this stage:

    • It’s her decision to make. Best you can do is try to influence her to change her mind and stay. You can do this by giving her unforgettable moments that will make her realize what she’ll be missing on.

  • What if she tells you that she loves you.. but it feels as if you’re just irritating her but she chats everyday with you?

    • Maybe that’s just your feeling. If you think there’s something she isn’t telling you, don’t hesitate to ask her about it. Remember that communication is one of the most important foundations of a good relationship. You wouldn’t know if there’s any issues you need to talk about unless you talk you her.

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